| SolveYourProblem Article Series: Time Management
How Can I Manage My Time Better?
Time
Flies: How To Approach Parenting
We
all know how time can go by too quickly. This is especially true if you’re a parent. You’re busy with
your day to day life and then one day you look around, and
your children are asking for the keys to the car. If you’re
a new parent and just starting out, there are a lot of things
that you can do to make your kids growing up easier on your
self. Your easiest way to approach your parenting role is to
think positive! Letting your kids grow and learn will give
them a sense of independence, and in the end they will value
their relationship with you. Your guidance and direction will
give them a self confident attitude.
How do you clip your wings from them, and let them fly free?
Answer: One step at a time.
In the end it’s not easy to let your children move on. You
will have to watch them walk out of that door for college or
a job. Don’t be disheartened though, there are things you can
do that will help ease this separation and both of you will
gain a lot of independence; it will just be gradual and much
less painful.
The following list will help you and your children achieve
happiness.
Ages
1 – 4 years old
It’s best to start when the children
are young. It’s a good idea to begin by letting your child
learn success and failure with small tasks when they are very
young. Whether they are inserting plastic donut shapes on a
ring, or picking up cereal with their young infant hands, they
are learning and growing. Show them how, and step back and
let them practice. You’ll hear cries of frustration but leave
them alone, and step in only when you feel it’s appropriate
with lots of encouragement and smiles.
Ages
5 – 12 years old
There
are a lot of physical and mental changes at this stage. A
desire for independence, and a let
me do it myself is in play. The hard part for you is to know
how to slip in and help without them really knowing it. Buy
toys and games that are age appropriate and just right for
small hands. Have the courage to step back and let them try.
New parents often feel the need to take over when their young
one is desperately trying to put that toy together. Give
them several attempts and then calmly ask if they need help.
A little
reverse psychology goes a long way too, such as walking away
and waiting for them to approach you when it just doesn’t
work. Remember to give them more responsibility that’s appropriate
too. Physical rewards are good, such as an allowance, but
don’t
overdo the payment. It makes them realize that most things
in life have a real price, and must be earned. Continue to
encourage them even when they fail.
Ages
13 – 18 years old
Experience
tells second time parents that the joy of childhood has now
slipped into the past. A
real experience awaits the parent of a teenager. This doesn’t
necessarily mean a bad thing, just totally different. Now
more than ever you’ll need patience and a very good memory!
Independence
takes a real step forward, and you’ll be required to chauffeur
your child to activities and functions, and the boy and girl
thing will start in earnest. It can be scary for you, but
if you’ve clipped your wings gradually, and taught them well
it
will be less stressful. Driving a car is the sure sign of
approaching adulthood. You can set rules and guidelines on
use. Of course
some will be more willful, but you can take away the keys
too. It might be good to let them experience what paying
for insurance
is like by requiring them to hold a part time job at 16,
or even letting them make the car payment. Again be ready
for
those unexpected moments of need. Be ready to help and encourage
with solid advice. So
letting go can be more enjoyable with these tips and
tricks for you. There still may be times when you just can’t let go,
but in the end letting them fly free to experience their world
is the best gift you can give them. They will make mistakes,
and run home to seek the advice of their parents. Be there
for them with an encouraging word and understanding, knowing
that you’ve given them wings to fly.
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by SolveYourProblem.com
: 2006
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