| SolveYourProblem
Article Series: Self Esteem, Self Worth & Shyness
I Desperately Want To Feel Better About Myself
What
is the Definition Of Self Esteem?
So what is the definition of self esteem?
It is simply a belief about our own worth. To esteem something
means to respect it or value it. If a person has low self esteem,
it means that they do not value themselves highly. They think
they are of less worth than other people.
The definition of self esteem includes emotions as well as
beliefs. People with self esteem tend to be proud of their
achievements and will talk about themselves without putting
themselves down. People lacking in self esteem, on the other
hand, often feel despairing and ashamed of themselves.
The
most widely accepted definition of self esteem was made by
Nathaniel Branden in 1969. He wrote that
self esteem is "the
experience of being competent to cope with the basic challenges
of life and being worthy of happiness."
So it means both feeling that we are competent and able to
meet the normal challenges that life holds, in a general way;
and also feeling that we merit happiness. People with low self
esteem will often feel that it is not OK for them to be happy,
and any time they are happy, something bad must be right around
the corner.
Self esteem is different from self confidence, which is more
about the way that we present to the world. People can be very
confident and have a lot of faith in their ability to perform,
but still place a low value on themselves.
For example, somebody could be very successful and confident
at work, but their low self esteem could mean that they have
a lot of trouble with relationships. Their low value of themselves
might make them reluctant to seek a relationship. Or it might
make them desperate to please, giving many gifts and trying
to do everything that the other person wants. It may even make
them abusive or likely to indulge in power games in relationships.
All these are signs that the person believes that somebody
would not want to be in a relationship with them just for themselves
alone.
The underlying beliefs that we are not of value or worthy
of happiness can be so deeply rooted that we are not aware
of them. If this is the case, the beliefs are rarely questioned
without something or somebody in the outside world calling
our attention to them.
This
is where therapy or a self-help
solution is very beneficial.
We can often be guided to see that our view of ourselves
is
just
a view
and
can
be
changed.
Self esteem is usually measured by means of a questionnaire
or quiz. People are asked various questions that demonstrate
their views about themselves and the world.
Some psychologists consider that high self esteem can be dangerous
too. People who place a high value on themselves can easily
feel threatened and become aggressive if other people challenge
this view, for example if they are insulted. However, other
psychologists would argue that this tendency is not self esteem
but narcissism. Their definition of self esteem is a feeling
of self worth that is stable, no matter what other people say
or think.
Click here to discover my current SolveYourProblem recommendation and choice pick for the fastest, easiest and best self-esteem and shyness solution you'll find anywhere. Get it and reward yourself with a feeling of incredible self-worth.
# # # # #
by SolveYourProblem.com
: 2010
> Home > Self
Esteem, Self Worth & Shyness
Articles : Main Page
|
