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eLearning Series: Self Confidence
How Do I Improve My Self Confidence?
( 50 articles in this series )
Self
Confidence in Just 5 Days
In order to be self-confident, eventually
you are going to have to silence the critics inside your mind.
Sometimes they sound like mom or dad, sometimes like an old
teacher or a respected friend. You've got to train yourself
to see the truth. Those aren't really the voices of your loved
(or not so loved) ones. You control what they say, and what
you hear.
Day One: Face Yourself
Go ahead and face yourself, once and for all. Look in the
mirror. What expression do you see staring back at you? A happy
one? A sad one? Suspicious? Angry? If you've got something
nasty to say, get it off your chest now. Then let it go. You've
chosen the path of self-support, so the criticisms - for right
now - don't matter anymore.
Day Two: Exercise Your Ego
Look
yourself in the mirror again, only this time, be prepared
to turn your words around. Remember the old saying in school?
Three put-ups for one put-down? Put that into effect in your
bathroom. Every negative thing you said yesterday needs to
be refuted, replaced and erased by three good things you see
in yourself.
And
yes, you do have to say them out loud. I want you to remember
what compliments sound like. I want you to differentiate
between the honest comments spoken aloud, and the negative
inner dialogue that holds you back out of fear.
Day Three: Keep the Music Alive
Sometimes, what's inside your head can drown out all the good
in the world. Train yourself to do the opposite. Listen to
some of your favorite songs, and play them in your head whenever
those negative voices kick in. If you're angry, play an intense
song in your head. Prong. Pink Floyd. Napalm Death. If you're
sad, a little Dave Matthews Band may do the trick.
Force yourself to think in emotions versus words, because
too often the words we choose don't really talk about how we
feel. They avoid feeling out of the fear of pain and skip straight
to criticism.
Criticism robs us of self-confidence. Pain helps us see who
we really are.
Day Four: Laughing Out Loud
Your negative dialogue starts to panic. It's being replaced.
What will you do to hold yourself back? It's truly amazing
how far our subconscious will go to prevent improvement just
to avoid the risks that come with change.
Sometimes this results in an all around foul mood. A funk
that keeps you indoors, out of the sun, away from friends,
and hunkered down at home. That on its own can sabotage a number
of goals, which in turn leads to failure and self-doubt.
What can we do to change that? It's as simple as flicking
on the TV, or running out to see a funny movie. Comedies, comic
strips, joke books - they all make us laugh. And laughter is
undeniably the best medicine for an ailing soul.
Day Five: Be Receptive to Compliments
If any, the midpoint will be the hardest piece of the puzzle
to accept. You've found ways of dealing with the negative voices
from outside your own head. An effective way to engage in positive
inner dialogue however is to daydream, and create separate
positive voices. Once you force their voices, it's easier for
them to talk on their own.
So who do you begin with? And how do you go about this without
feeling so ridiculous?
If you pay attention from day to day, you will
find many people paying you compliments you didn't notice
before. "Thank
you," by itself can boost your self-esteem. Catch hold
of these and replay them throughout the day in your mind. A
particularly beautiful young lady, or attractive gentleman
may become a life-long friend ... inside your head.
As time goes on you can add to the cast of characters. Just
as parents, friends, and teachers can take up negative space
in your brain, so can they fill it with loving support. Remember,
the words aren't being said by anyone else. The choice is yours.
# # # # #
SolveYourProblem.com
: 2006
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