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eLearning Series: Self Confidence
How Do I Improve My Self Confidence?
( 50 articles in this series )
How
To Draw on Friends for Self Confidence
The
very act of having friends can inspire confidence. You're someone who is worth being around. Friends
can bring so much more to your life, though.
You
should be able to count on your friends for support. When
you're feeling low, they're there to tell you about your good
qualities and make you feel better about yourself. They can
remind you of the times when you've lacked confidence in the
past while telling you that they know you can bounce back once
again. They can help you put it all in perspective and perhaps
serve as a source of inspiration if they've faced their own
struggles with self-confidence.
While it can be good to compare yourself to
your friends for inspiration, you should never do so to the
point that you start
to feel bad about yourself. It doesn't matter if you're friends
with a Nobel-prize-winning supermodel; there is no reason to
discount your own positive qualities by making unnecessary
comparisons. Your friends shouldn't make you feel bad about
things that they do "better" than you, either.
If you read these descriptions and find yourself thinking
that you have friends that don't fit these qualities, you may
want to think about the role of these friends in your life.
Are they having a positive influence on you?
Are
you feeling low on friends? As the years pass, we sometimes
drift away from our friends when someone gets a new job, gets
married or experiences some other major life change. It can
be a blow to your confidence when you look around and realize
that you don't have as many friends as you once had.
First, if you have some friends you have drifted apart from
but would still like to stay in contact with, don't waste any
time. Send an e-mail or make a quick phone call as soon as
possible to let your friend know that you still want to stay
in touch. Try to set up a time when you can meet for a lunch
date, movie night or sporting event. It will take extra effort,
but it may be possible to preserve a friendship that has started
to falter.
Be willing to let a friend go, though, if it just isn't working
out. You'll feel worse about yourself if you continue to have
awkward conversations and disinterested meetings. Sometimes
two people change to the point that they're no longer a good
fit for each other, and it would do more harm than good to
try to preserve the friendship. Look back on your happy memories
whenever you're feeling down and take heart in the fact that
if you've made new friends in the past, then you can certainly
find new friends again.
The
simplest step towards making new friends is to be friendly. If you're welcoming to everyone you meet, people will feel
more inclined to get to know you better. If you want to make
new friends, you can't be afraid to make the first move. Start
with some small activity that the two of you can do together.
You can ask someone new to sit by you at lunch or ask a co-worker
if he'd like to work out with you. If this sounds too daunting,
then consider putting together a group activity like a dinner
party or a girls' night out. Then you won't have to feel like
you're singling out any one person as a potential friend while
expanding your social circle and paving the way for future
friendships.
If someone else makes the first efforts to start a friendship
or invites you to a group event, take advantage of every opportunity.
Even if the activity doesn't sound too interesting at first,
it's probably worth a few hours of your time to scope out a
potential friend, as long as he or she isn't asking you to
do anything that goes against your morals. If you keep an open
mind and stay on the lookout for social opportunities, you
should have new friends in no time.
Whether you're hanging out with your grade school pals or
someone you met this week, positive friendships can be a constant
source of self-confidence.
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SolveYourProblem.com
: 2006
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