SolveYourProblem Article Series: Parenting & Family
Here's Some Friendly Parenting Advice


What’s A Parent’s Worst Nightmare?
by Jeff Cohen

Parents can’t help it. The moment their children spring forth into the world, parents worry about their little ones with every breath they take. Accidents, deaths, failures — these are just some of the worst nightmares parents have.
 
A less alarming, but still troublesome problem parents stress over is the possibility that their child might fail a class. Every parent wants his or her child to constantly be ahead of the pack and atop every class, but sadly, this isn’t possible all the time. This is why parents need to know how they can be there for their children in times of academic difficulty.
 
Your kids might be the ones taking the exams and going thru school, but at the same time, you are worrying like crazy over their academic performance. No doubt you worry that your children will be judged by their classmates and teachers, and how they perform is a reflection on you. The old saying “learning starts at home” really increases the pressure and forces you to take whatever measures are needed to ensure that your child performs brilliantly in class.
 
If you want your child to excel academically, here are some guidelines on what you should and shouldn’t do for your child.

What not to do:

Bribery. So your child doesn’t want to study? Don’t promise him food, gifts, or money just to get him to study. This will set off a dangerous cycle and will make the child think that refusing to perform his responsibilities is the key to getting the things he wants.

“Helping” Your Child. It’s one thing to assist your child in understanding certain concepts, but it’s quite another to constantly furnish him with the answers to all of his questions. Instead of helping him to become more self-reliant and teaching him to look things up by himself, you are only increasing his dependence on you. This will not help him at all in school, where you will not be around to give him the right answers.

What to do:

Keep a watchful eye. This rings true for both working parents and parents who work at home. You can ask your child how his lessons were for that day, and keep a subtle eye on him while he’s working on his homework. Just make sure that you’re not breathing down his neck and pushing him to study all the time.

Provide much needed encouragement. Again, assisting your child every once in a while is fine. Just make sure to do it in moderation, and that you won’t rush to his side every time he’s stumbled on a problem. You can help him in other ways by giving him a snack to keep his energy up while studying, or by adding some extra details that can help him understand his homework better.

Hire a Tutor. Complimenting your child’s in-school lesson plans with a after-school lessons, may help your child immensely. Some teachers may also make themselves available if a tutor is not an option.

As for your own concerns, remember that if your child doesn’t turn out a stellar performance in class, it is no reason to punish him or love him any less. Just make sure that you remain supportive and encouraging, and remember that there are always many other chances for your child to improve. Straight A’s and a "book smart" only child doesn’t necessarily translate to future success. A thoughtful, "street smart" child is fantastic too.

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Posted: Jun 4, 2008
About The Author / Credits:
SolveYourProblem.com : 2008
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