In this article I will discuss one disciplinary technique that research has found to be least effective in promoting morality in children: physical punishment. In fact, such research has shown that hitting and spanking a child has an inhibiting, negative effect on children's moral behavior. The least honest, most aggressive children were those who were spanked frequently, whereas the most honest children were those who were spanked least often, received plenty of love, and were given careful explanations for the family rules.

Let me offer what I consider to be one reasonable explanation why physical punishment inhibits moral development in the young.

Many years ago I saw a movie, The Reivers, starring Steve McQueen. It was about a boy who took off to Memphis with two older, disreputable characters and had a grand time drinking and frolicking in a house of ill repute until he returned home to his stern and disappointed grandfather.

Our young hero, feeling terribly guilty, expected a spanking. He was crushed when he was told that he would not be spanked but would have to live with his guilt instead.

Grandfather knew that the worst punishment he could give his grandson was not to spank him but instead to let him suffer with his guilt and think awhile about what he had done wrong.

When we feel guilty, it is because we have violated our moral values and so are angry at ourselves. Guilt is a way we punish ourselves.

Since guilt feelings are unpleasant, most people want to reduce or be rid of them. And this can be done in one of two ways: either by being punished for the misbehavior or by avoiding the misbehavior. When we spank a child, we may take away his guilt feelings for him, thereby robbing him of the opportunity to avoid guilt himself by avoiding the behavior that produces guilt.

A spanking for our young hero would have been painfully brief, but the passing of that pain would have brought the passing of his guilt. He would have paid his debt, so to speak, and so could have then forgotten the entire incident.

What I am here trying to suggest, and what psychological research has found to be true, is that spanking does not make for the internalization of rules, moral values, and behavior control that is necessary for moral development.

Physical punishment is imposed from without by others, whereas guilt feelings are imposed from within by ourselves. The conscience is an internal mechanism, not an external one, that meets our punishment for misbehavior in the form of guilt.

We want our children to avoid or reduce guilt feelings by controlling their behavior themselves, and not be accepting a spanking for misbehavior, feeling less guilty, and then misbehaving again.

This is not to say that we should not use some type of punishment when our children misbehave. In my example above, grandfather knew that no punishment would be the worst punishment for his shamefaced grandson.

When our children know they have behaved badly, perhaps the most effective punishment is to send them to their rooms with instructions to determine how they can correct their misbehavior. Let them fully experience their guilt and decide on ways to alter their behavior so as to reduce that guilt.

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